Episode 1012: Does he look to you like a man under a curse?

Vampire Barnabas Collins has escaped from the continuity in which Dark Shadows took place until late March 1970 and found himself in an alternate universe, which the show insists on calling “Parallel Time.” This universe is largely populated by people who remind Barnabas of their counterparts in his own world, but their personalities and relationships are very different from those he knew. His own counterpart is a case in point. That other Barnabas Collins never became a vampire, but lived a quiet life and died a natural death in 1830.

Barnabas’ first few weeks in Parallel Time were spent trapped in a coffin. Alcoholic novelist Will Loomis found out about Barnabas after he saw fang marks on the neck of his wife, the former Carolyn Collins Stoddard, and decided he could force Barnabas to give him a complete history of his career as a vampire. Will was under the impression this would make a good book. Will’s irresponsibility in keeping a vampire as a pet, his cruelty in exploiting a fellow creature for his own gain, and his lack of literary judgment in imagining that a recounting of the plot of weeks 43 through 196 of Dark Shadows would be both a bestseller and a critical favorite come back to bite him. More precisely, Barnabas comes to bite him when Will lets him out of his coffin and turns his back on him for a moment during their interview, taking the cross out of his sight and freeing Barnabas to attack.

Barnabas forces Will to burn all the pages he has already written. The idea of a book detailing Barnabas’ crimes featured in #326, #510, and #756, and may have planted the seed for the whole conception of Will Loomis.

Will and Carolyn live in the Old House on the grounds of the estate of Collinwood, which in the original continuity belongs to Barnabas. The pages are still in the fireplace when drunken sourpuss Quentin Collins, master of the great house of Collinwood and proprietor of the family businesses, bangs on the door and demands admittance.

Quentin interrogates Will. The name “Barnabas Collins” has been cropping up in the oddest connections lately, and Quentin is convinced Will knows why. Their exchange is getting quite warm when Barnabas enters and introduces himself.

Quentin is bewildered to see Barnabas. Through a time warp that occasionally manifests in the east wing of his house, he has caught a few glimpses of the original continuity, mostly in the form of people standing around talking about how Barnabas is missing and is under a terrible curse. So he is inclined to be leery of this fellow claiming to be a descendant of the Barnabas who died in 1830. Barnabas specifies that his great-grandfather was the son of that Barnabas, the son who went to Peru in the nineteenth century. Quentin had read that that son of Barnabas died while still in Peru. Barnabas says that he did not die in that country. He does not specify where his ancestor went after leaving Peru, but says he spent the rest of his life in poverty. He was so ashamed of this circumstance that neither he nor any member of his family could bear to reconnect with the rich Collinses in Maine. Barnabas claims that he has now made a fortune of his own, leading him to conclude that the time is right for a reunion. Barnabas invites himself to the great house in an hour. Quentin says that the morning would be better, to which Barnabas replies that he will not be free then. Quentin acquiesces.

Quentin exits, and Barnabas orders Will to accompany him to the grave of his counterpart. Longtime viewers will remember #660, when Barnabas managed to travel back in time by going to a grave and yelling at its occupant. Now he hopes to travel sideways in time, returning to his own universe, by the same technique.

Barnabas and Will enter a graveyard we have seen several times in the last seven weeks. It differs from the cemeteries we have seen in the original continuity in that none of the grave markers is in the form of a cross. Most of the graves in the cemetery from which Barnabas emerged were marked with crosses, and he strolled by them with perfect equanimity. The cemetery set was built for Barnabas, so evidently it was not the original plan that the cross would be formidable to him. It wasn’t until #450, 48 weeks after Barnabas debuted, that he was first held at bay with a cross. Even after that, he still strolled placidly through the field of crosses in Eagle Hill Cemetery. Now the apotropaic power of the cross is a major point, and they have designed the cemetery in this universe to accommodate Barnabas’ special needs.

Barnabas calls on his counterpart. He conjures up a spirit, but it is not that of Barnabas Collins (d. 1830.) It is Joshua Collins, father of that Barnabas. The sight prompts Barnabas to gasp “Father!” Joshua denies that Barnabas is any kin to him. Barnabas tries to explain that, while that is true, he is nonetheless Barnabas Collins, son of Joshua, eliciting an angry command “Do not profane those names!” Joshua tells Barnabas to take his vileness back where it came from. Before Barnabas can explain that is what he is trying to do, Joshua vanishes.

Joshua orders Barnabas to go back where he came from. Screenshot by Dark Shadows Before I Die.

Joshua appeared to Quentin and Angelique in #1009. That turn was not particularly effective. The visual composition made it too clear that Louis Edmonds was standing in the same space as David Selby and Lara Parker for the actors to create any sense of the uncanny. And Joshua hung around too long and had too many lines for it to make sense that he couldn’t give any useful information. But this time Joshua is off to the side, lit by his own light, and he disappears after just a few seconds. It is a powerful scene, especially for longtime viewers who remember the relationship between Barnabas and Joshua we saw when the show was set in the 1790s from November 1967 to March 1968.

Will is terrified. The apparition leaves him trembling and speechless. So far Will has cut an arrogant, self-assured figure. He handled his encounter with the vampire with aplomb. Even after Barnabas bit him, his resistance to the command to burn the pages showed that self-assured personality is still partly functional. But the ghost of Joshua has blasted away the last of it.

Barnabas tells Will that he now has only one way back to his own universe, the way he came. There is a room in the east wing of the great house that is bare and vacant in Barnabas’ universe, but that is fully furnished, richly decorated, and brightly lit here. When Quentin’s wife Angelique Stokes Collins was alive, it was her bedroom. Now Quentin has given it to Angelique’s identical twin sister Alexis to occupy while she is his guest. The barrier between the universes is at its thinnest there. Barnabas could occasionally see into Angelique and Alexis’ room from the main continuity, and it was when he was looking through the doors to the room that Quentin has seen that other Collinwood. Barnabas was in the room when it changed, and found himself here. Now he wants to go back to the room, and make the opposite journey.

What neither Barnabas nor Quentin knows is that Angelique has returned from the dead and murdered Alexis. Angelique is now impersonating Alexis. In her life, Angelique had built a little cult of people who expected her to transcend death. The only one she has so far told that she has actually done so is her aunt, Hannah Stokes. Everyone else believes she is Alexis.

Barnabas enters the drawing room of the great house, where Quentin introduces him to “Alexis” and to housekeeper Julia Hoffman, the most devoted member of Angelique’s cult. Hoffman and “Alexis” had been talking about Barnabas before he arrived. Hoffman expressed certainty that Barnabas is a fraud. But after he and Quentin leave to examine the room where the Parallel Time phenomenon can sometimes be seen, she admits that his resemblance to the portrait of Barnabas is too strong to disregard. “Alexis” remembers what Quentin heard while he was watching the people in the room, and asks Hoffman if Barnabas looks like a man under a curse. She does not appear to have expected this question.

Quentin takes Barnabas to the room. Sure enough, the other continuity is visible. Barnabas’ best friend is there, talking to herself about how much she hopes to see him again. She is mad scientist Julia Hoffman, MD, counterpart of Hoffman. Julia is as devoted to Barnabas as Hoffman is to Angelique. Seeing her, we wonder how long Angelique can keep it a secret from her Julia Hoffman that she has returned.

Episode 1009: Remember the dead

The Graves of All Those Who Once Lived Here

The name “Barnabas Collins” has been coming up in the oddest circumstances around the estate of Collinwood. The only person of that name known to drunken sourpuss Quentin Collins, the master of the great house, was an ancestor of his who lived a long dull life and died a natural death in 1830. Quentin has decided that it is time to ask Barnabas’ spirit what’s going on. He wants housekeeper Julia Hoffman to join him and his late wife Angelique’s identical twin sister, Alexis Stokes, in a séance.

Hoffman is reluctant to participate, and when the invocation prompts theremin music to start playing in the background she breaks the circle of fingers and runs out of the drawing room. But Hoffman is not the most problematic participant. Alexis is not in fact present. Angelique returned from the dead, murdered her, and took her place. Unknown to Hoffman or to Quentin, it is the undead Angelique who is at the table with them.

“Alexis” tells Quentin that she felt a presence before Hoffman broke the circle, but that it is gone now. Suddenly a figure appears in the corner of the room. He identifies himself as the ghost of Joshua Collins, father of Barnabas. Joshua addresses his remarks to Quentin, ignoring “Alexis.” He says that Quentin knows all he needs to know about his son Barnabas, but that there is another entity at Collinwood, an evil that is at once living and dead. “Alexis” looks shocked and says “Living and dead? How can that be possible?” I suppose we should praise Lara Parker for resisting the temptation to pad her part by visibly squirming and playing up the fact that this describes her character precisely. She is giving the audience credit for the brains needed to make that connection. But if I wanted a show that gave me credit for brains, I wouldn’t watch Dark Shadows every evening, so I’m disappointed. I wish she were tugging on her collar and fidgeting like a Hank Azaria character on The Simpsons.

Joshua can’t be any more specific. This might have been OK had he just flickered into view for a few seconds, uttered his vague warning, and flickered out. We would then be left thinking of the awe-inspiring improbability of even the most fleeting communication between the living and the dead. But as Joshua, Louis Edmonds stands there for several minutes, in the same light as the other actors. They’ve had trouble with one of the microphones lately, occasionally making one actor sound like they are far away from the person standing next to them, but that microphone isn’t used in this scene. Both the audio and the video make it clear Joshua is occupying the same space as Quentin and “Alexis.” The result is an embarrassment for which writer Gordon Russell and director Henry Kaplan must share the blame.

This embarrassment is particularly disappointing under the circumstances. The scene is Edmonds’ first appearance since going off to play his part in the feature House of Dark Shadows after #990, and the first appearance of this Joshua Collins. Edmonds played another version of Joshua from November 1967 to March 1968, when Dark Shadows was set in a different universe. That Joshua figured in a costume drama segment set in the 1790s. He emerged as the central figure in a tragedy in the course of which his son Barnabas became a vampire and he had to decide what to do about him.

This Joshua never dealt with such a curse. The audience knows, if only because the opening voiceover told us, that the vampire Barnabas has crossed over into this universe, into this year 1970, and that he is at present trapped in a chained coffin in the basement of the home where the Joshua we meet today raised that other, luckier Barnabas. We last saw the other Joshua in #623, and longtime viewers will be excited at the idea of seeing Edmonds reprise the character who was perhaps his greatest triumph. To see him in such a debacle lets us down hard.

After Joshua leaves, Quentin and “Alexis” talk for a moment. Then Quentin’s brother Roger enters. Roger is also played by Louis Edmonds, but neither Quentin nor “Alexis” notices that he looks like Joshua. This works well enough, since Edmonds takes a very different posture and tone as Roger than he had as Joshua. Joshua was erect and stentorian, Roger curls to his left as he sits on the couch and purrs about how tedious it is to read about the life of the late Barnabas.

Quentin exits, and Roger talks with “Alexis.” He says that despite her resemblance to her sister, he never for a moment thought she was Angelique. In fact, when he first met the real Alexis he was utterly shocked, certain she was Angelique, and she had to work hard to bring him around. But Angelique doesn’t know about that, and Roger doesn’t want to remember it, so she just looks at him placidly while he goes on and on about how unlike anyone else Angelique was and how he knew her more intimately than anyone else could, even though she was married to Quentin.

I suppose Russell may have been trying to make a point by juxtaposing Joshua’s long pointless speech in which he keeps referring to Quentin’s responsibilities as the master of Collinwood with Roger’s long pointless speech in which he keeps referring to his mystical connection with his brother’s late wife. We saw in the 1790s segment that the Joshua of the other continuity was the victim of his own virtues. A forceful, dynamic man devoted to his family and its honor, he became a tyrant in pursuit of his worthy goals, and saw everyone he loved destroyed in part because of his haughtiness. As generation followed generation, Joshua’s misguided strength and brittle courage would yield to ever weaker, ever-softer descendants. Perhaps in the contrast between this Joshua’s attempt to help his successor use the authority he once held when he cannot impart any useful information and Roger’s fatuous pretense to have known Angelique uniquely well when he cannot recognize that he is talking to her we can see the same decline in this iteration of the Collins family.

The Legal Eagle

Meanwhile, mad scientist Cyrus Longworth has a problem of his own. Cyrus has developed a potion which, when he drinks it, transforms his appearance so drastically that even those closest to him cannot recognize him. When thus disguised, he calls himself “John Yaeger,” spends a lot of money, and beats people up. This makes him very happy, but now chemist Horace Gladstone, his connection for one of the potion’s vital ingredients, has learned his secret. Gladstone will not supply him with more of the ingredient or keep his mouth shut about Cyrus’ crimes unless he gets $10,000 in cash.

Cyrus’ lawyer, Larry Chase, comes to his laboratory. On Cyrus’ instructions, Larry has drawn up a will naming “Yaeger” as the sole beneficiary of Cyrus’ estate. Larry has met “Yaeger” and been appalled by him. He urges Cyrus to reconsider. Cyrus signs the papers and invites Larry to a late supper. Larry declines, saying that Horace Gladstone called him earlier and wants to meet him outside the Eagle tavern at 10 PM.

Larry was in the drawing room at Collinwood going over some papers with Quentin when he got Gladstone’s call. Cyrus’ newly drafted will fell out of Larry’s briefcase, and Quentin read through it while Larry was looking for another document. Quentin asked some questions about the will. Larry responded to the first by saying that he couldn’t talk about it, but thereafter blabbed away, revealing everything Quentin could want to know. With that level of regard for a client’s confidential communications, we aren’t surprised when Larry tells Cyrus who he is going to meet at what time in what place.

After Larry goes, Cyrus takes the potion, that is, puts on his disguise. He goes to the alley next to the Eagle, in which the sign for the Greenfield Inn hangs. He corners Gladstone there. He beats Gladstone to the pavement with his heavy cane. Gladstone begs for mercy, and Cyrus sneers at him. He releases the bayonet from inside the cane, stabbing Gladstone with it. The first time Cyrus took the potion, he had amnesia after he resumed his normal appearance, and we could believe that he was less than fully responsible for what he did while under its influence. But he has had his full memories on each subsequent occasion, and has shown pleasure when told of the harm “Yaeger” has done and the fear he inspires. By this point, we can classify Cyrus’ killing of Gladstone as nothing other than premeditated murder.

Cyrus doesn’t really surprise us by this act. It is Larry who does something we would not have expected. While Gladstone is in the alley, Larry is already in front of the tavern. We see enough of the set that we cannot believe he is more than 30 or 40 feet away from Gladstone, just around the corner. Gladstone cries out when “Yaeger” attacks him. We cut to Larry, and see him react to that cry and start towards the alley. “Yaeger” stands over Gladstone and pontificates for a minute or two before stabbing him. Even after that, “Yaeger” still has time to get most of the way out of the alley before Larry finally arrives. It took Joshua Collins less time to get from the abode of the dead to the drawing room at Collinwood than it takes Larry to walk the few steps from the sidewalk to the alley. Maybe he had to stop somewhere along the way to make some more announcements about a client’s business.

Larry hears a cry for help. Screenshot by Dark Shadows Before I Die.