Episode 1109: It’s the same as it was in the future

The ghost of Gerard Stiles kills Daphne Harridge, Tad Collins, and Carrie Stokes. It was his idea to bring these three back to life in recent weeks after he murdered them the first time, in 1841. Daphne regained a body of her own, while Carrie and Tad took possession of the bodies of Hallie Stokes and David Collins. Now all of them are dead again, David and Hallie into the bargain. What the point was of any of that, none can say.

Gerard waves a green polyester flag from the window of the room on top of the tower at the great house of Collinwood, prompting zombies to rise from the dead and wreck the house. The shots of the earth heaving as the zombies rise from their graves were anticipated when David waved the flag in #1089, when a monster masquerading as a man named Jabez Hawkes raised some zombies in #963, and when wicked witch Angelique raised Jeremiah Collins from the dead as a zombie in #392/393. For that matter, the whole graveyard scene was anticipated in the 1959 feature film Plan 9 from Outer Space, and actor Chuck Morgan, who also played one of Jabe’s zombies, even looks like Tor Johnson.

Laugh if you must, but he’s leading a group of six who will demolish an incomprehensibly large haunted house in a single night. That’s more than you’ve done.

The Destruction of Collinwood will leave most of the Collins family dead, missing, or hopelessly insane. That was prophesied when vampire Barnabas Collins and mad scientist Julia Hoffman traveled to the far-off future year 1995 in #1061-1070. It also echoes a line with which heiress Carolyn Collins Stoddard greeted well-meaning governess Victoria Winters in #2, “Welcome to the House of Usher.”

Julia escapes from the zombies and finds herself in 1840. She has to leave Barnabas behind in 1970, where he is busy wrestling with some of the zombies. Each of Dark Shadows‘ major costume drama segments has begun with a character from the contemporary setting alone in an unfamiliar past. Victoria served this function in the first costume drama segment, when the show went to the 1790s from November 1967 to March 1968; Barnabas did it in March 1969, when the show started an eight months tour in the year 1897. Now it is Julia’s turn. She eventually joined Barnabas in 1897; we may wonder whether Barnabas, or perhaps someone else, will manage to find their way to her from 1970.

Episode 1107: Bury me not

A lot happens in this one, and all the actors do a good job. Even so, it feels very slow. None of the incidents seems to connect with any of the others.

Ill-dressed man Sebastian Shaw lets himself into the secret room where vampire Barnabas Collins keeps a coffin. It is not the coffin where Barnabas spends his days, but is the resting place of another vampire. Its occupant is Roxanne Drew, whom Barnabas loves and Sebastian hates. Sebastian opens the coffin, pulls a pistol, and aims it at Roxanne. He is about to fire when another figure appears in the corner of the room. Regular viewers recognize this figure as the ghost of pirate Gerard Stiles. Sebastian does not know that Gerard is a ghost. He fires two shots at him, of course without effect.

Barnabas enters. He disarms Sebastian, who tells him he was going to destroy Roxanne but that a man stopped him. Barnabas recognizes his description of Gerard. Sebastian shows Barnabas the bite marks on his neck, and explains he was under Roxanne’s power until recently. She lost her control of him when she began feeding on governess Maggie Evans. Longtime viewers have often wondered why Barnabas didn’t build an army by biting everyone who got in his way and turning them into his blood slaves; this is the first explicit statement on the show that a vampire risks losing control over one victim by taking another. We’ve seen examples of Barnabas’ power weakening when he takes an additional victim, but this has been far from consistent.

Sebastian shouts so loudly the microphone distorts his voice in a way we’ve never heard before on the show. Screenshot by Dark Shadows Before I Die.

Barnabas asks if Roxanne ever mentioned the name Gerard Stiles. Sebastian says that he believes she did, but that he can’t remember in what connection it came up. We’ve had a few hints recently that Roxanne has some kind of association with Gerard and the other ghosts who are taking over the great house of Collinwood. This doesn’t give any substance to these hints, but it does confirm that the writers plan to keep dropping them.

Upstairs, Barnabas visits the other undead female he is keeping in his house, former ghost Daphne Harridge. He questions Daphne, who confirms that there was a girl named Roxanne Drew around Collinwood when she and Gerard were alive in 1840. She doesn’t remember much about Roxanne, but does recall that there was some drastic change in her that got people talking in that year. The show is obviously preparing for a trip back in time to 1840, so with this we learn that Roxanne will figure in that segment and that we will see how she became a vampire.

Another rehumanized ghost, Quentin Collins, enters. Barnabas orders Daphne to leave with Quentin, going far away from Collinwood before Gerard can get at her. Quentin tells Daphne to take Barnabas’ orders. When she protests, he says “Daphhh-neee” in a slow, condescending voice. David Selby started doing this in March to July 1970, when Dark Shadows was set in an alternate universe and he played a different Quentin Collins, one who was married to Maggie’s counterpart. That Quentin was an insufferable jerk who often scolded Maggie with a slow, condescending “Maaaa-ggie.” Hearing him say Daphne’s name in that tonal format this time, I finally realized what it reminded me of. Ted Knight, as pompous newsman Ted Baxter on the Mary Tyler Moore show, would often pronounce the two-syllable names of people he was addressing using the same intonation. All of a sudden I could hear Quentin telling “Murrr-ray!” he shouldn’t put such complicated words in the copy he writes, or “Georrr-gette” not to be so independent. When I mentioned the resonance to my wife, Mrs Acilius, she laughed and said she couldn’t believed she hadn’t noticed it herself.

Barnabas leaves Daphne alone with Quentin. They toast their future life. Daphne abruptly collapses, and Quentin clutches his stomach. Gerard appears, and Quentin asks him why he has poisoned them. Quentin is an expert on ghosts who poison the living. In #677, he was himself a ghost, and he put strychnine in a drink his great-grandson Chris Jennings took. Barnabas’ buddy, mad scientist Julia Hoffman, saved Chris then. Now, Julia is with Barnabas when he returns to the room. Daphne is on the floor, unconscious but still alive. Quentin is nowhere to be seen.

Barnabas goes to the great house, searching for Quentin. He finds heiress Carolyn Stoddard Hawkes, playing a mad scene. Nancy Barrett and Jonathan Frid make Carolyn and Barnabas sound like Ophelia and Claudius in Act 4, Scene 5 of Hamlet, for a little while anyway. When Barnabas tells Carolyn that they must stop what is happening, she replies “I cannot stop anything. Whatever gave you the impression that I could?” It really is lovely.

Barnabas goes back to his house. Julia has treated Daphne, who is resting comfortably, aside from glycerin tears streaking her face at several angles, none of them convincing. Carolyn enters and demands to be left alone with Daphne. Julia and Barnabas know that Carolyn is intermittently possessed by a ghost known as Leticia, who is somehow associated with Gerard and Daphne, and are therefore reluctant to comply with this demand. But they apparently don’t think they have much to lose, so they go along with it.

Carolyn/ Leticia gives Daphne a dress. It is the dress she wore when she was a ghost. Daphne cries out to Gerard, asking if the time has really come. She then goes and hides in the closet. There was a lot of dull business with clothes when Quentin was a ghost, late in 1968, and they recycled that early in the current haunting, five weeks ago. This moment is easier to take, both because it is mercifully brief and because the dress is clearly legible as a sign of imminent story progression in the form of Daphne’s next death.

Quentin and Gerard are in a graveyard. Quentin has recovered from the poisoning sufficiently to smile lovingly at Gerard and say that he can’t imagine why he ever thought he was his enemy. He examines the tombstones in the fenced-off part of the graveyard and reminisces about the men buried under them, men who were underlings of Gerard’s in 1840. Since Quentin is only 100 years old, he is puzzled that he has memories from 130 years ago, but when he takes another look at Gerard’s smiling face his anxiety dissipates. He looks at a blank tombstone and puzzles as to why it is blank. At Gerard’s bidding, he digs up the grave and opens the coffin. He is delighted to realize that it was meant for Quentin Collins, and that the time has come for him to get into it. He briefly resists the idea of burying himself alive, but then looks at Gerard, says “You are Death. Whatever made me think I could run away from you?,” and complies. We end with Gerard putting the dirt back on top of the grave, Quentin securely inhumed.

Longtime viewers know that Quentin is alive because of a magical portrait that immunized him against aging, lycanthropy, and injury. So we are left wondering whether he is also covered for asphyxiation. If he is, Gerard is going to be pretty embarrassed when Quentin makes his way out of the ground.

Episode 1105: Look for the H and follow the arrow

From March until July 1970, Dark Shadows was set in a universe other than the one where the action had taken place up to that point. In that universe, which the show insists on calling “Parallel Time,” the counterparts of heiress Carolyn Collins Stoddard and woebegone lowlife Willie Loomis were a married couple. That other Will Loomis was a bestselling but hard-drinking author who had squandered his earnings, and Carolyn Loomis was a poor relation of the master of the great house of Collinwood. They bickered incessantly, in an adaptation of Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? that, in the hands of John Karlen and Nancy Barrett, sometimes seemed to rival Edward Albee’s original.

We’ve been back in the original continuity for five weeks now. The Carolyn we have known from the first week of the show is back, but she is half mad, intermittently possessed by a ghost known as Leticia Faye. Willie is helping time travelers Barnabas Collins and Julia Hoffman in their efforts to battle two distinct supernatural menaces, one consisting of a group of ghosts including Leticia, the other a vampire whose identity they have not discerned but whom they know to be feeding on governess Maggie Evans. Carolyn and Willie have their first scene together today since the return from Parallel Time. It is infused with the energy Karlen and Miss Barrett brought to their versions of Albee’s George and Martha. Karlen has some scenes alone where he wanders around and shouts in the general direction of a microphone; those don’t work at all. But when he has Miss Barrett to anchor him, he’s terrific and so is she. When she addresses him as “Willie Loomis!,” we are, for one lovely moment, right back in Loomis House.

Carolyn gives Willie a riddle and tells her that unless he’s too stupid to solve it, it will lead him to the missing governess: “Where the north woods path is narrow, you’ll be at sixes and sevens, but look for the H and follow the arrow, that points to Maggie Evans.” That riddle reminds longtime viewers how far the show has come in the last three years. The last time Maggie was the victim of a vampire, it was the summer of 1967 and the ghoul was Barnabas. The ghost of Barnabas’ little sister Sarah appeared to Maggie in the cell where he and his blood thrall Willie were keeping her and gave her a riddle which she solved, finding an escape route and avoiding the death Barnabas had planned for her. Now Maggie is helpless, and Willie and Barnabas are the good-ish guys. This riddle will enable Willie to come to her rescue.

Willie goes to the narrow part of the path through the north woods. He shines a flashlight directly into the camera, a sure sign that we are watching Dark Shadows. Willie finds himself in a graveyard. He notices a tombstone inscribed with the name of Harrow. Subtracting the H, what’s left is “arrow.” He keeps moving his eyes rightward beyond the edge of the stone and sees the door of a mausoleum. He goes inside and finds Maggie on the floor, beside an empty coffin. He infers that the empty coffin must be where the vampire rests during the day.

H + arrow = Harrow. Screenshot by Dark Shadows Before I Die.

Willie takes Maggie back to her room at Collinwood and confers with Julia and Barnabas. Barnabas decrees that Willie and Julia should go to the mausoleum during the day and stake the vampire. When they do, they are uneasy to find that no one is guarding the coffin. The episode ends with Julia’s expression of shock when she sees inside the coffin.

Episode 1089: Why hasn’t anything happened?

It’s often said that the most compelling villains of stage and screen are played by the nicest actors. That’s often explained by saying that the audience can pick up on a sweetness in the actor even when the character is doing the most vile things, making it possible for us to enjoy watching actions that sound like they would be unbearable even to think about.

I suppose there is some truth to that. Certainly Jonathan Frid’s abundant kindliness helped to make the fiendish Barnabas Collins a pop culture sensation in the 1960s, as David Selby’s sunny good nature made the thoroughly deplorable Quentin Collins almost as popular. But it is also the case that the function of a villain is to focus attention on other cast members. The villain makes things happen that get us wondering what the heroic characters will do to oppose them, how vulnerable characters will elicit our pity and admiration by their noble suffering, and which differently vulnerable characters will wrestle with their consciences as they are drawn into the villain’s web of sin. That function is one that might be expected to appeal to the most generous members of the profession, those most eager to help their fellow players show what they can do.

The villain in this portion of Dark Shadows is supposed to be the ghost of Gerard Stiles. Gerard is played by James Storm, who is by all accounts as adorable a human being as Jonathan Frid, David Selby, or anyone else. If the actor’s lovableness were all it took to make a villain a hit, Mr Storm’s face would have been on the cover of every issue of 16 magazine from the summer of 1970 on.

But in fact, the writers have let us down. Gerard is not doing what we expect of a villain. Today he takes possession of matriarch Elizabeth Collins Stoddard. As a result of that possession, Liz becomes an emotionless drone and checks out of the story. That’s the common theme of all Gerard’s possessions- he stops his victims from exchanging information with others, slowing everything down and leaving them with nothing to do. He does not really serve the villain’s function at all. So far from bringing out the best in the whole cast as Barnabas did in his heyday or Quentin in his, Gerard has caused the plot to grind to a halt, leaving the characters playing out variations on the same few scenes over and again. He is a non-villain in the middle of a non-story.

Longtime viewers know that Dark Shadows has been chiefly about time travel since November 1967. When we see the ghosts, dwell on their wardrobe, and hear living characters tell us what they’ve been reading in documents from the years 1840 and 1841, we know that the show is getting ready to take us to that period for an extended costume drama segment. To the extent that the current haunting generates any suspense at all, that suspense comes from our wondering what explanation we will find in that upcoming segment for the activities of the ghosts. What was it about teenagers Tad Collins and Carrie Stokes when they were alive that makes their ghosts want to take possession of their lookalikes David Collins and Hallie Stokes, why will that possession result in the deaths of Hallie and David, and why will Tad and Carrie’s ghosts merge with theirs and appear in clothing from 1970? What goal does Gerard have that will be advanced by the possession and death of Hallie and David? What exactly is the relationship between Gerard and the ghost of Tad and Carrie’s governess Daphne Harridge? Are Daphne’s dealings with Quentin and the teens entirely in service of Gerard’s aims, or does she have goals of her own? The ongoing story has been laboring mightily to raise these questions, and it has been made very clear that none of them will be resolved until we get to 1840.

We do pick up a couple more bits of information today that we will have questions about in 1840. The show’s chief heroine and audience identification character, Julia Hoffman, reads that Gerard’s ship, the Java Queen, was a pirate vessel. That may remind us of #208, when David told dangerously unstable ruffian Willie Loomis of a legend about a pirate who fell in love with a lady at Collinwood and brought her jewels. That story was a nod to Daphne Du Maurier’s Frenchman’s Creek, one of the “Gothic romance” novels that had inspired Dark Shadows in its early days. Willie found out too late that Dark Shadows wasn’t that kind of show anymore when he opened a chained coffin and found, not jewels, but Barnabas. Maybe when we get to know him as a living being, Gerard will bring in a little bit more of the “Gothic” element. Or at least we can hope that he will reveal his piratical background by overemphasizing the Rs in his name. Avast, ye mateys, beware of Gerrr-ARRRRd!

Moreover, Julia reads that the Java Queen wrecked off Collinsport exactly 129 years ago, on Thursday, 27 August 1841. In our universe, 27 August 1841 was a Friday, but apparently the calendar is aligned a little bit differently in the continuity where Dark Shadows takes place. I suppose there must have been a readjustment sometime between 1841 and 1970, because today is Thursday, 27 August 1970, which matches the day on which that date fell in our world.

Be that as it may, anniversaries have had the power to make things happen on Dark Shadows ever since it first became a supernatural thriller with the introduction of undead blonde fire witch Laura Murdoch Collins in late 1966. Laura was going to incinerate herself with her son David on a particular date in 1967 because other women named Laura Murdoch had incinerated themselves with their young sons named David on the same date in 1767 and 1867. When you don’t follow the laws that science lays out for us, you have to come up with some other mechanism of cause and effect to keep the audience in suspense, and anniversaries will serve as well as anything else.

Julia reads on in her book. The captain of the Java Queen was widely feared, though his name was never known. He was the sole survivor of the crash off Collinsport, and he vowed that he would raise his men from the dead and resume his reign of terror.

David takes Hallie to Gerard’s grave. Cemeteries have been hotspots on the Collinsport dating scene since well-meaning governess Vicki insisted her boyfriend, instantly forgettable lawyer Frank Garner, take her to the old cemetery north of town in #153, but David and Hallie are not a couple and this is no mere social outing. David has told Hallie that you can tell whether the dead are at rest by standing on their graves at the stroke of midnight.

While they are waiting for the appointed time, Hallie notices a fenced-in area in the middle of the old cemetery and asks who is buried there. David tells her that that is where criminals were buried in the eighteenth and nineteenth centuries, mostly in unmarked graves. He says that there are a lot of legends about how vicious they all were. He goes on to say that their spirits are supposed to be restless because they are so vile that Hell won’t have them. Hallie is, as usual, teetering on the brink of a fit of the screaming meemees, and this story makes her teeter even more rapidly.

At midnight, Gerard shows up. He approaches Hallie and David. They run away. When he was walking towards them, Gerard had his arms in front of him, bent at an angle that suggested he was hoping one of them would lead him in a waltz. When they run away, he has a disappointed look that makes us wonder if that’s all he wanted.

You lead. Screenshot by Dark Shadows Before I Die.

Back at the great house, David and Hallie run into Julia. She demands to know what they were doing outside. David says they were out for a walk. Julia says that people do not take walks at one in the morning. That’s right, characters on Dark Shadows usually wait until three o’clock to start roaming about. Julia takes quite an authoritative tone for someone who is staying in the house as a permanent guest. While Julia is focusing her sternness on Hallie, whom she really seems to dislike, David sees a note tucked in the book Julia was reading. He slips the note in his pocket. He then asks Julia whether she is going to tell his Aunt Liz that she caught him and Hallie sneaking into the house so late. Julia agrees not to, and David thanks her.

Hallie and David go to her bedroom. As you would expect a teenage boy and girl to do when alone in a bedroom in the small hours of the morning, they conduct paleographic research. They examine the note, commenting on the age of the paper and features of the handwriting. They see that it concludes with the siglum “G,” which they hypothesize may indicate that it was written by Gerard. They read the text: “Know ye who do not rest in the town of Collinsport! In the dead of night watch for the signal, as ever before the green flag in the window. Three times shall it wave, as it did in days of yore!” Hallie claims that she doesn’t understand “a word of it!” For a second it seems like David might start explaining words Hallie might not be familiar with, such as “flag” and “green,” but he thinks better of it and assures her that he, too, finds the note puzzling.

David says that he thinks there might be a green flag in the tower room at Collinwood. I don’t know how he got that from the note, but if getting clarification requires Hallie to deliver more dialogue I’m just as happy to leave it unexplained. David goes to the tower room, finds a green polyester flag wedged into something attached to the ceiling, and starts waving it out the window. We cut back to the cemetery, where the soil on top of one of the graves in the enclosure is heaving. In view of the power of anniversaries in the universe of Dark Shadows, it makes perfect sense that polyester would have a profoundly disquieting effect on people who died in 1841, since polyester was invented in 1941- exactly one hundred years later.

Episode 1012: Does he look to you like a man under a curse?

Vampire Barnabas Collins has escaped from the continuity in which Dark Shadows took place until late March 1970 and found himself in an alternate universe, which the show insists on calling “Parallel Time.” This universe is largely populated by people who remind Barnabas of their counterparts in his own world, but their personalities and relationships are very different from those he knew. His own counterpart is a case in point. That other Barnabas Collins never became a vampire, but lived a quiet life and died a natural death in 1830.

Barnabas’ first few weeks in Parallel Time were spent trapped in a coffin. Alcoholic novelist Will Loomis found out about Barnabas after he saw fang marks on the neck of his wife, the former Carolyn Collins Stoddard, and decided he could force Barnabas to give him a complete history of his career as a vampire. Will was under the impression this would make a good book. Will’s irresponsibility in keeping a vampire as a pet, his cruelty in exploiting a fellow creature for his own gain, and his lack of literary judgment in imagining that a recounting of the plot of weeks 43 through 196 of Dark Shadows would be both a bestseller and a critical favorite come back to bite him. More precisely, Barnabas comes to bite him when Will lets him out of his coffin and turns his back on him for a moment during their interview, taking the cross out of his sight and freeing Barnabas to attack.

Barnabas forces Will to burn all the pages he has already written. The idea of a book detailing Barnabas’ crimes featured in #326, #510, and #756, and may have planted the seed for the whole conception of Will Loomis.

Will and Carolyn live in the Old House on the grounds of the estate of Collinwood, which in the original continuity belongs to Barnabas. The pages are still in the fireplace when drunken sourpuss Quentin Collins, master of the great house of Collinwood and proprietor of the family businesses, bangs on the door and demands admittance.

Quentin interrogates Will. The name “Barnabas Collins” has been cropping up in the oddest connections lately, and Quentin is convinced Will knows why. Their exchange is getting quite warm when Barnabas enters and introduces himself.

Quentin is bewildered to see Barnabas. Through a time warp that occasionally manifests in the east wing of his house, he has caught a few glimpses of the original continuity, mostly in the form of people standing around talking about how Barnabas is missing and is under a terrible curse. So he is inclined to be leery of this fellow claiming to be a descendant of the Barnabas who died in 1830. Barnabas specifies that his great-grandfather was the son of that Barnabas, the son who went to Peru in the nineteenth century. Quentin had read that that son of Barnabas died while still in Peru. Barnabas says that he did not die in that country. He does not specify where his ancestor went after leaving Peru, but says he spent the rest of his life in poverty. He was so ashamed of this circumstance that neither he nor any member of his family could bear to reconnect with the rich Collinses in Maine. Barnabas claims that he has now made a fortune of his own, leading him to conclude that the time is right for a reunion. Barnabas invites himself to the great house in an hour. Quentin says that the morning would be better, to which Barnabas replies that he will not be free then. Quentin acquiesces.

Quentin exits, and Barnabas orders Will to accompany him to the grave of his counterpart. Longtime viewers will remember #660, when Barnabas managed to travel back in time by going to a grave and yelling at its occupant. Now he hopes to travel sideways in time, returning to his own universe, by the same technique.

Barnabas and Will enter a graveyard we have seen several times in the last seven weeks. It differs from the cemeteries we have seen in the original continuity in that none of the grave markers is in the form of a cross. Most of the graves in the cemetery from which Barnabas emerged were marked with crosses, and he strolled by them with perfect equanimity. The cemetery set was built for Barnabas, so evidently it was not the original plan that the cross would be formidable to him. It wasn’t until #450, 48 weeks after Barnabas debuted, that he was first held at bay with a cross. Even after that, he still strolled placidly through the field of crosses in Eagle Hill Cemetery. Now the apotropaic power of the cross is a major point, and they have designed the cemetery in this universe to accommodate Barnabas’ special needs.

Barnabas calls on his counterpart. He conjures up a spirit, but it is not that of Barnabas Collins (d. 1830.) It is Joshua Collins, father of that Barnabas. The sight prompts Barnabas to gasp “Father!” Joshua denies that Barnabas is any kin to him. Barnabas tries to explain that, while that is true, he is nonetheless Barnabas Collins, son of Joshua, eliciting an angry command “Do not profane those names!” Joshua tells Barnabas to take his vileness back where it came from. Before Barnabas can explain that is what he is trying to do, Joshua vanishes.

Joshua orders Barnabas to go back where he came from. Screenshot by Dark Shadows Before I Die.

Joshua appeared to Quentin and Angelique in #1009. That turn was not particularly effective. The visual composition made it too clear that Louis Edmonds was standing in the same space as David Selby and Lara Parker for the actors to create any sense of the uncanny. And Joshua hung around too long and had too many lines for it to make sense that he couldn’t give any useful information. But this time Joshua is off to the side, lit by his own light, and he disappears after just a few seconds. It is a powerful scene, especially for longtime viewers who remember the relationship between Barnabas and Joshua we saw when the show was set in the 1790s from November 1967 to March 1968.

Will is terrified. The apparition leaves him trembling and speechless. So far Will has cut an arrogant, self-assured figure. He handled his encounter with the vampire with aplomb. Even after Barnabas bit him, his resistance to the command to burn the pages showed that self-assured personality is still partly functional. But the ghost of Joshua has blasted away the last of it.

Barnabas tells Will that he now has only one way back to his own universe, the way he came. There is a room in the east wing of the great house that is bare and vacant in Barnabas’ universe, but that is fully furnished, richly decorated, and brightly lit here. When Quentin’s wife Angelique Stokes Collins was alive, it was her bedroom. Now Quentin has given it to Angelique’s identical twin sister Alexis to occupy while she is his guest. The barrier between the universes is at its thinnest there. Barnabas could occasionally see into Angelique and Alexis’ room from the main continuity, and it was when he was looking through the doors to the room that Quentin has seen that other Collinwood. Barnabas was in the room when it changed, and found himself here. Now he wants to go back to the room, and make the opposite journey.

What neither Barnabas nor Quentin knows is that Angelique has returned from the dead and murdered Alexis. Angelique is now impersonating Alexis. In her life, Angelique had built a little cult of people who expected her to transcend death. The only one she has so far told that she has actually done so is her aunt, Hannah Stokes. Everyone else believes she is Alexis.

Barnabas enters the drawing room of the great house, where Quentin introduces him to “Alexis” and to housekeeper Julia Hoffman, the most devoted member of Angelique’s cult. Hoffman and “Alexis” had been talking about Barnabas before he arrived. Hoffman expressed certainty that Barnabas is a fraud. But after he and Quentin leave to examine the room where the Parallel Time phenomenon can sometimes be seen, she admits that his resemblance to the portrait of Barnabas is too strong to disregard. “Alexis” remembers what Quentin heard while he was watching the people in the room, and asks Hoffman if Barnabas looks like a man under a curse. She does not appear to have expected this question.

Quentin takes Barnabas to the room. Sure enough, the other continuity is visible. Barnabas’ best friend is there, talking to herself about how much she hopes to see him again. She is mad scientist Julia Hoffman, MD, counterpart of Hoffman. Julia is as devoted to Barnabas as Hoffman is to Angelique. Seeing her, we wonder how long Angelique can keep it a secret from her Julia Hoffman that she has returned.

Episode 964: Plan 9 from Down East

We are approaching the end of the sixteenth week of a segment made up of material drawn from the tales of H. P. Lovecraft. Central to this is the idea of the Leviathan People, a race of Elder Gods who want to retake the Earth and eliminate humankind. There has been a lot of good stuff in these episodes, but it hasn’t come together as a unit. At this point, the narrative seems to be falling apart completely.

The harbinger of the Leviathans, who appears to be a tall man in his mid twenties named Jeb but is in fact a four-month old shape-shifting monster who would rather be called Jabe, has lost interest in the plan and wishes he could be a real boy. Jabe has alienated virtually everyone with whom he has come into contact, including people who were under heavy mind-control meant to turn them into his slaves, and has been reduced to raising four recently deceased men to serve him as zombies.

Yesterday, he ordered the zombies to kill five of his enemies. The targets he listed were mad scientist Julia Hoffman, vampire Barnabas Collins, Barnabas’ servant Willie Loomis, and Barnabas’ distant cousins Roger Collins and Quentin Collins. The zombies have abducted Julia and brought her to Jabe’s house. She is welcomed there by a man named Sky Rumson. Sky is not a zombie, but may as well be for all the skill Geoffrey Scott brings to the role. When Scott recites his dialogue, you get the impression that he is telling you what an actor would say had they cast one in the part. Grayson Hall could fill any stage without support, making Julia’s scene with Sky relatively painless, but if it was meant to have any significance the audience will never know what that was.

Sky and a zombie force Julia into the back room of the house, where Jabe is in the squamous, rugose, and paleogean form of the true Leviathan. She is terrified by the sight. Jabe resumes his human shape. He and Julia go back to the living room, where he confides in her that he doesn’t want to take his Leviathan form ever again. He wants to renounce his powers and become human. He knows that Julia is giving Barnabas treatments to put his vampirism into remission, and that she succeeded with such treatments when Barnabas was under a different vampire curse in 1968. He asks her to help him rid himself of his Leviathan side. She is unsure she will be able to do so, but can’t resist the challenge. By the end of the scene, she is figuring out what tests she will have to run to diagnose the biochemical basis of Jabe’s condition.

Christopher Pennock really was a fine actor, and he is outstanding in this scene. He sounds like a deeply lonely, helplessly confused young boy who can’t figure out how to overcome the consequences of his own abuse of the people around him. Jabe’s request for Julia’s help and his agreement to lay off Barnabas as the price for it doesn’t fit with the orders he gave the zombies yesterday, the actions he takes later today, or anything else in the Leviathan story, and is a sign that the plot is falling apart faster than the writers can patch it up. But he and Hall are so splendid in showing Jabe’s neediness and Julia’s response to it that it doesn’t matter.

Meanwhile, Sky is at the great house of Collinwood, looking for Jabe’s foster mother-turned-makeout partner Megan Todd (it was 1970, everyone took Freud very seriously.) He meets Roger and Quentin there. They hold him at sword point until he tells them where Julia is and how to get past the zombies. To the extent that there is a reason for Sky to be on the show, it is to illustrate how total the control is the Leviathans have over the minds of the people they have co-opted, so when he gives in so quickly to Quentin’s threat to give him a scar (not even to kill him, just to compromise his potential as a model for deodorant ads) he dissolves the last prospect that the Leviathans themselves will be a danger we can care about.

Quentin goes off to rescue Julia, and Roger assumes responsibility for holding the sword. He is momentarily distracted when he sees Megan in the window, and Sky takes advantage, disarming Roger and running out of the house. Outside, he meets Megan and tells her that Jabe is upset with her for some reason. She asks if he is afraid of her. He is puzzled by the question, and tells her she is very beautiful. She invites him to look at her. As he does, she opens her mouth, revealing vampire’s fangs. She bites him.

Megan finds breakfast. Screenshot by Dark Shadows Before I Die.

Quentin arrives at Jabe’s house. Jabe is surprised to see him, but not surprised Sky was too chicken to keep any of his secrets. He orders the zombies to seize Quentin. The tall, portly, shaven headed zombie, who wears a mustache that keeps him from being mistaken for Tor Johnson in Plan 9 from Outer Space, slaps Quentin in the face a single time. With this, Quentin instantly loses consciousness. Yesterday, other zombies slapped Julia and Roger in the face, each a single time, and each of them instantly lost consciousness as well. Great ones with slaps, the zombies.

Jabe instructs the zombies to stuff Quentin into a coffin that is about three feet too short for him, and then has them carry it all the way to the cemetery. He has them bury Quentin in a grave that one of them had recently vacated. I suppose real-estate flipping has been interesting to TV viewers for longer than I had thought.

There is a famous goof in today’s episode. When Quentin grabs the sword out of its display on the wall of the Collinwood drawing room*, the lamp underneath it falls off the table and smashes on the floor. You know this wasn’t supposed to happen because it takes place out of frame and you can hear the stagehands sweeping the floor while Sky is pinned to the wall. Also, Dan Curtis was way too tight with a buck to break a lamp for the sake of a scene that’s mainly about a character as minor as Sky Rumson. It’s a shame they couldn’t have pulled the camera back and shown the lamp shattering, it would have been perfectly suited to the moment. And if they had to sweep up the wreckage right then, well, it would have been hilarious if housekeeper Mrs Johnson had come in with her broom and dustpan, taken care of the mess, and left without a word about what Quentin and Roger were doing to Sky.

A fine lamp about to meet its doom. Screenshot by Dark Shadows Before I Die.

*Something he first did in #703, when he and Barnabas first met. He knocked a lamp over then, too.

Episode 962: So many ways to lose people

The chief villain on Dark Shadows at the moment is a shape-shifting monster from beyond space and time who has decided the only shape he is interested in assuming is that of a tall young man. When he first appeared in this form, the monster asked people to “Call me Jabe.” Jabe is supposed to seize control of the Earth and eradicate the human race, but he couldn’t even get people to comply with this simple request. He’s been answering to “Jeb” for weeks now.

Several of Jabe’s followers, people who were completely down with the part about exterminating all humans, have found that his personality is just too much to put up with. Some of these are trying to destroy him. One of Jabe’s followers-turned-aspiring-assassins is a crazed sadist known only as Bruno. Yesterday, Bruno trapped Jabe with a werewolf, a creature to whom Jabe is vulnerable. Jabe escapes from the werewolf and confronts Bruno about his attempt to murder him.

Jabe is unconvinced by Bruno’s paper-thin excuses, but is shocked when Bruno tells him that Megan Todd, who was once Jabe’s foster mother and his most devoted follower, has been bitten by vampire Barnabas Collins and is now helping Barnabas in his own battle against Jabe. When Jabe finds a sleeping Megan calling out for Barnabas to summon her and sees the bite marks on her neck, he blames himself. Barnabas, too, used to be one of Jabe’s followers, and when he turned against him Jabe made him a vampire. He refuses to let Bruno kill Megan, and instead puts him in charge of keeping her away from Barnabas.

Jabe puts Bruno in charge of Megan. Screenshot by Dark Shadows Before I Die.

Regular viewers would likely not have been surprised that Jabe survived yesterday’s closing cliffhanger- once he is gone, the current story will end, and they don’t yet have anything ready to go when that happens. But we would have expected Jabe to kill Bruno. That he not only does not do this, but keeps him around, shows just how precarious Jabe’s position has become. He is surrounded by enemies, many of whom know all of his secrets, and several of whom have supernatural powers. His grip on his few remaining allies is uncertain, and he does not seem to have the tactical sense to use his own powers effectively. So the writers have to slow the story way down to keep from running out of road.

Meanwhile, the werewolf is prowling through the woods. He meets his great-grandfather, Quentin Collins. It was a curse Quentin brought on himself that made him and his male descendants werewolves. The same magic spell that put Quentin’s own lycanthropy into remission immunized him against aging. The werewolf recognizes Quentin as one of his own kind and won’t attack him. When the sun comes up, the werewolf collapses and reverts to the form of Chris Jennings, who resembles his great-grandfather in that each of them is twenty-nine years old.

Quentin tells Chris that he wants to help him; Chris says that he ought to, since it’s his fault that he’s a werewolf. Quentin doesn’t have anything to say to that, nor is he willing to give Chris the help he asks for, which is immediate death. He asks Chris what he remembers; he says that the night before, Bruno was holding him prisoner, aided by the reanimated corpse of Sheriff Davenport. Chris wonders if he killed Bruno.

Quentin and Chris go to the old crypt where Bruno and Zombie Davenport had kept Chris. They find the shredded remains of Davenport’s defiled corpse, but no trace of Bruno. Quentin tells Chris that he didn’t kill any living person, that he only returned to death something that had already died, and rightly so. He advises Chris to avoid zombies from now on. When we heard Quentin offer this great-grandfatherly guidance, Mrs Acilius laughed out loud- what does Quentin think, that Chris spends his nights hanging out at the zombie bar?

It turns out Chris will have more trouble following great-granddad’s counsel than he might have thought. At the end, Jabe stands in a cemetery, by a row of four fresh graves of men each of whom died in his thirties, and prays to the “god of the Underworld” to raise them so that he can use them to kill five other people and send their souls his way forever. Whichever god he reaches apparently likes the terms of this deal, because a hand pops up through the dirt.

This post is something of a private milestone for me. I was inspired to blog about Dark Shadows by Danny Horn’s great Dark Shadows Every Day. As the title would suggest, Danny’s original idea was to post about an episode a day, but as he went his posts got to be more and more ambitious and less and less frequent. He posted a review of #1170 in October 2019, then gave up altogether for several months, not posting again until July 2020. Danny started with #210; since the makers of the show skipped some episode numbers, #1170 was the 946th episode he had covered. I started at the beginning, so #962 is my 947th episode.

My project is in no way comparable to Danny’s. I have his blog to consult, as well as other fine sites, especially John and Christine Scoleri’s Dark Shadows Before I Die, while he was usually the first to review the episodes he dealt with. And my posts are nothing like as ambitious as were his. So, if I have only a few stray remarks to make about an episode, I just make those remarks and call it a day. In that situation, Danny would write a detailed review of a novel or a board game or something else related to the show, or analyze an historical event connected with it, or compose a stunning prose poem, then append his remarks about the episode as a postscript. But modest as my aims are, I’m still haunted by the fear that I’ll run out of steam, so it’s reassuring to me that I’ve maintained daily posting beyond the point at which he took his long hiatus.

I have my eye on a couple of upcoming Danny-derived benchmarks. He posted about a total of 1018 episodes; I’ll reach that number with #1033 on 10 June. And of course #1170 itself has a cursed aura, I’ll be glad to get beyond that. Once I do, I’ll probably be counting down by percentages until I reach the end of the series with #1245 in April 2027.

After April 2027, I plan to review the feature film Night of Dark Shadows* in a post to go up on the 56th anniversary of its release, 3 August 2027, and Tim Burton’s 2012 film Dark Shadows at some point thereafter. I’m leaning towards reviewing the series that aired on NBC in primetime in 1991 and the pilot that Dan Curtis shot for the WB network in 2004. If I do write about those things, the posts will go up sometime after the one about Night of Dark Shadows and before the one about the Tim Burton movie. I probably won’t cover any of the novels or comic books or newspaper strips or other spinoffs. I did review Dan Curtis’ TV movie of Frankenstein on a preemption day in 2024, and if I review any of his other standalone adaptations of material that Dark Shadows mined it will be on upcoming preemption days, not as posts that appear after I’ve finished the original series.

*House of Dark Shadows was released 28 October 1970, while the show was still on. My post about it should go live on 28 October 2026, the same day as the one about #1132.

Episode 953: Every move unwise

For most of 1968, Dark Shadows was a shapeless mess. The makers of the show had caught on that the audience liked monsters, so they kept tossing one monster after another into the mix, hoping to repeat the popular success they had had with vampire Barnabas Collins the year before. One of the storylines that ended up disappointing this hope most completely was that centering on 6’4″ Frankenstein’s monster Adam; another was the “Dream Curse” that was supposed to revive Barnabas’ vampirism after it had been put into remission by the mad scientists who created Adam.

Suave warlock Nicholas Blair was on the show in those days. Nicholas appeared to be a regional manager for Satan’s operations in upper New England. He found out about Adam and came up with the idea of using him as the progenitor of a new species that would displace humankind and win the Earth for his master. Adam met heiress Carolyn Collins Stoddard and fell hard for her. He also developed an interest in the writings of Sigmund Freud. But he never clicked with the audience, and Nicholas’ plan didn’t make any sense in the context of the show. So the plan flopped and Nicholas was called to the main office. He’s back today.

The A story for the last fourteen weeks has been the effort of the Leviathan People, a race of Elder Gods, to use a 6’4″ shape-shifting monster as the progenitor of a new species that will displace humankind and win the Earth for them. The monster, who once invited people to call him Jabe, met Carolyn and fell hard for her. The Leviathans want Jabe to take Carolyn as his bride and turn her into a creature like himself, but he would rather be human and take Carolyn out on dates. Jabe isn’t the reader Adam was. Adam might be interested in Jabe’s current projects, though. When he was growing into his adult form, Jabe’s foster parents were antique dealers Philip and Megan Todd. He has now arranged to kill Philip, and as we open today he is passionately kissing Megan.

The door opens, and Nicholas enters. He tells Jabe that he is his boss, and that the Leviathan takeover of the Earth was his idea. It is the same idea that didn’t work last time he was on the show, and when he tells Jabe that he failed that time he adds that he does not intend to be punished for failing again.

Nicholas bullies Jabe into going to his room and turning into the inhuman monster he really is. Henchman Bruno shows up to consult with Nicholas while Jabe is in the room. Nicholas tells Bruno it is his responsibility to see to it that Jabe doesn’t kill anyone else. Nicholas leaves, and Bruno goes into Jabe’s room. Less than a minute after Nicholas told him to keep Jabe from further killing, Bruno is standing before the monster, apparently about to be killed.

Bruno manages to get out of the room alive. Jabe returns to human form and follows him. Bruno gasps that Jabe was going to kill him. Jabe replies that he wasn’t, “it was.” Adam might have found significance in this remark. One of Freud’s central concepts was a division between the ego (from the Latin pronoun equivalent to the English “I”) and the id (from the Latin for “it.”) People repress their unacceptable urges and attribute them to something separate from themselves. So, I don’t want to kill my father and marry my mother, it does. Bruno tells Jabe that in the room, he is “it,” and moreover that he himself, as a devotee of the Leviathans, wants to become something like “it.” Evidently the Leviathans’ promise to their followers is that they will replace their ambiguous and divided personalities with pure unreasoning id.

Jabe tells Bruno that he wants to be human. Bruno is horrified by this, commanding “Don’t even say that!” Indeed, Nicholas had said that for the Leviathan People, wanting to be human is the ultimate sin. That suggests a backstory which, if developed, might make the Leviathans scarier than they are. All tales of Elder Gods who want to take the Earth back raise the question of how they lost it in the first place. If our remote ancestors figured out a way to take it from them, surely we, who can learn everything they knew and add to it knowledge they lacked, will be able to prevail against them at least as easily.

But if it was envy of early humans that wrecked the Leviathan world order, a couple of possibilities open up. It could be that some of them defected to join us, so that their final defeat was mostly a struggle between Leviathans with our forebears as helpless on-lookers. In that case, it would remain to be seen whether humans could beat Leviathans. It could also be that the Leviathans who joined the human side have descendants among humans today, and that some of those descendants are vulnerable to co-optation by the Leviathans who are trying to reclaim their former position. There is a hint today that this might turn out to be the case- Bruno asks Nicholas why the estate of Collinwood is so important, and Nicholas, looking uncomfortable, tells him that there is a reason, but that he cannot explain it. Perhaps the members of the Collins family have some Leviathan blood that makes them at once receptive to the appeals of their estranged kinfolk and peculiarly dangerous to them if they are antagonized.

Nicholas is a logical choice to represent the idea that the greatest weakness of the Leviathan People is the temptation to become human. At the zenith of his power in 1968, he would reprove his subordinate Angelique for her romantic feelings for Barnabas, sneering that they made her “so human.” His downfall began when he fell in love with Maggie Evans, The Nicest Girl in Town, and found himself being humanized. So if Jabe is going to meet his doom because his desire for Carolyn makes him renounce his Leviathan form, he is going to remind longtime viewers of Nicholas, and we may as well have Nicholas on the show.

They may have had another reason to want Humbert Allen Astredo back in the cast. Lara Parker used to say that none of her acting lessons really took, and that it was only when Astredo would explain various techniques to her between rehearsals of their scenes as Nicholas and Angelique in 1968 that it all finally clicked for her. I’m sure Parker was exaggerating to make a self-deprecating joke, but it is undeniably true that her performances improved greatly after she had been working with Astredo for a while. So maybe the producers were hoping that some of the less experienced actors in the cast would benefit from time with this outstanding teacher.

The Dream Curse involved more than a dozen repetitions of a sequence over a period of months while one character after another had the same basic nightmare. The sequence involved opening a bunch of doors and seeing enigmatic images. Each time another character had the dream a little bit was added. At the end, it turned out that the curse was not able to renew Barnabas’ vampirism, so there was no point to any of it. For some reason, this did not go over very well with the fans.

Lately, Carolyn has been having a recurring nightmare. We see it for the third time today. The first time she had it, Jabe told her all about himself, and she saw that he had killed someone. Not too long after she woke up, her distant cousin Quentin came by and told her that Jabe had murdered her father Paul. The next time she went to sleep, she had the dream again, and it was clearer that Paul was one of the people Jabe had murdered. This time she even opens Paul’s coffin. She can’t figure out what the dream means. Too bad Adam isn’t around, by now he must have read Freud’s Interpretation of Dreams and enough of the case studies to apply his technique. If she told him the dream, he would be able to explain to her that the dream means that she is an hysterical female who needs to keep coming to him at least twice a week.

Jabe visits Carolyn, who tells him all about the dream. Not being trained in psychoanalysis, Jabe doesn’t tell her about her unresolved Electra complex or even send her a bill. He just rushes out to exhume Paul’s coffin. This leads to one of the most extraordinary images in Dark Shadows. They wanted to show that Paul’s body was there, but actor Dennis Patrick was by this time in California, producing and taking a role in the movie Joe. So they superimpose a photo of Patrick’s face on a still of a plush-lined box. The resulting image defies all description:

Screenshot by Dark Shadows Before I Die.

I’d remembered this as an image they flashed on the screen for a moment, but no, they hold it for quite a while. And then they go in for a closeup! Which is the last thing we see before the credits roll!

Screenshot by Dark Shadows Before I Die.

An old friend of mine has a brother who was hung up on Dark Shadows for a while, he apparently got the DVDs and watched them obsessively for months. When I told him that I was writing this blog, he claimed that this picture of Paul was the only thing he remembered about the show. I can believe it, really. I often try to figure out what they were thinking when they put the episodes together; as you can see with my speculation above about how the Leviathans lost the power they used to have over the Earth, sometimes I resort to some fairly elaborate fanfic to try to puzzle it out. But why they believed it was appropriate to put this image on national television, let alone to linger over it, cut back to it in closeup, and leave it as the climactic episode-ender, that stumps me completely.

Episode 948: A sign of your freedom, and of mine

The first ghost we saw on Dark Shadows was that of the gracious Josette Collins, who came down from her portrait and danced around the outside of the Old House on the grounds of the estate of Collinwood in #70. We had first heard of Josette in #5, when drunken sad sack Sam Evans told well-meaning governess Vicki Winters about her, and she had been mentioned many times in the first fourteen weeks. From #70 until #191, Josette’s ghost became a steadily bigger part of the story. She rallied the other ghosts of Collinwood to rescue Vicki from crazed handyman Matthew in #126, and from that point until #191 guided Vicki in her battle with undead blonde fire witch Laura Murdoch Collins. By the end of the Laura story, Josette was firmly established as the chief figure in the show’s supernatural back-world, a world which the action is continually tugging into view.

Vampire Barnabas Collins succeeded Laura as the show’s supernatural Big Bad. Josette was well-suited to do battle with the distant and indefinable Laura, but was too wispy to be very effective against the more dynamic Barnabas. In #212, Barnabas addressed Josette through her portrait in the Old House, which we had seen strange and troubled boy David Collins use to carry on conversations with her in #102 and #162. Barnabas spoke to Josette then as if she were his grandmother, who had sided with his father against him in a fateful conflict, and told her he was kicking her out of the house. Over the next few weeks, there were several episodes when David lamented Josette’s absence from the Old House, suggesting that Barnabas had succeeded in banishing her.

As it became clear Barnabas was a hit and would be kept on the show for a while, they decided to connect him to Josette. So they borrowed the story of the 1932 film The Mummy. As Boris Karloff’s undead Imhotep decided that Helen Grosvenor was the reincarnation of his lost love Princess Ankh-Esen-Amun, so Barnabas decided that Josette, retconned as his lost love, had been reincarnated as Maggie Evans (Kathryn Leigh Scott,) daughter of Sam. As Imhotep abducted Helen and tried to turn her into Ankh-Esen-Amun, so Barnabas abducted Maggie and tortured her in an attempt to erase her personality and upload Josette’s in its place.

In the movie, Helen and Ankh-Esen-Amun were both played by Zita Johann. The original viewers wouldn’t have known it, but Miss Scott, wearing a veil, played the ghost of Josette in #70 and voiced Josette’s lines to Vicki in #126. In the scenes during the Laura story when we caught glimpses of Josette’s face, the ghost was played by frequent stand-in Rosemary McNamara, who looked enough like Miss Scott that viewers may have wondered if she was playing the role. So the idea of a connection between Maggie and Josette had been rattling around the writers’ room for a while. In #240, David saw Maggie wandering around Barnabas’ house. She was wearing Josette’s dress but no veil, in a daze and answering to Josette’s name. Afterward, David said that he had seen Josette and that she looked exactly the same as she did when he had seen her as a ghost. That confirmed that Maggie was at least a Josette lookalike, if not her reincarnation.

Maggie eventually escaped from Barnabas. Her psychiatrist, Julia Hoffman, saw in Barnabas her chance to make a career as a mad scientist, and so she sold Maggie out, using her magical power of hypnosis to delete her memory of what Barnabas did to her and leave her with a feeling of goodwill towards Barnabas. By that time, Barnabas had turned his attentions to Vicki, toying with the idea of Josettifying her. Josette’s ghost made it clear to him that she would try to stop any such effort when she spoke through Vicki at a séance in #280 and 281; after that, Barnabas gave her portrait another talking-to, telling her that she was lost to him forever and must let him live in the present. It sounded like he was going to stop trying to turn girls into Josette, but he kept pushing Josette’s hypnotic music box on Vicki, so if that’s what he meant he didn’t stick with it.

In November 1967, Vicki went back in time to the days when Barnabas and Josette were living human beings. From then until March 1968, Dark Shadows was a costume drama set in the 1790s. Miss Scott was cast as the living Josette, completing the parallel with the flashbacks to ancient Egypt in The Mummy and suggesting that Barnabas, though he was appallingly cruel and thoroughly crazy, was onto something when he told Maggie she was Josette.

The whole idea of supernaturalism is that what appears to be powerless is in fact most powerful and vice versa, so having been powerful as a ghost, Josette has to be at least somewhat understated as a living being. Making matters worse for her, the 1790s segment moved at a breakneck speed, piling one bizarre disaster on top of another, so that there was no time to develop the kind of subtle strength a lady of her sort might be expected to have or to give us much of a look at Josette and Barnabas as a loving couple before everything went horribly wrong for them. She winds up as a pleasant but ineffectual person. The 1790s period was the show’s first great triumph, but it did knock Josette out of the spotlight permanently.

A couple of weeks after Dark Shadows returned to contemporary dress in March 1968, Barnabas’ vampirism went into remission and he tried to function as a good guy. His bumbling attempts at heroism generated as much trouble for everyone as had his villainy. Julia had made herself a permanent houseguest at Collinwood, and she was the one who was busiest with the work of containing his damage. Throughout the part of the show made and set in 1968, Josette was all but forgotten.

Early in 1969, Barnabas came unstuck in time and found himself in 1897, once more subject to the vampire curse. During his eight months in that period, he met two more characters played by Miss Scott. Each of them led him into a fresh bout of Josettery. He gave the music box to neurotic intellectual Rachel Drummond; after her death, he met Kitty Soames, dowager countess of Hampshire, who despite her title was a young woman from Pennsylvania. The music box showed up in Kitty’s room at a time when Barnabas could not possibly have been around, and it became clear that this time, it was Josette herself who was trying to take possession of Kitty.

In #884, airing in November 1969, Kitty was assumed bodily into Josette’s portrait. Barnabas saw this happen. He then returned to the 1790s, to the night when Josette originally flung herself to her death from the cliff at Widows’ Hill rather than let Barnabas turn her into a vampire. Josette had only the vaguest memory of 1897 or of Kitty; as far as she is concerned, she was living through this night for the first time, and was experiencing time in the usual linear fashion.

Barnabas tried to prevent Josette’s suicide, but succeeded only in changing the method she used to do herself in. By the time he returned to the twentieth century, he had fallen under the sway of the Leviathan People, a race of Elder Gods who are trying to retake the Earth from humankind. For a time he led a cult that served them in this goal, but eventually became disaffected. He hesitates to take any very definite action against the Leviathans, because they told him they were “holding Josette prisoner in the past” and that they would inflict on her a more horrible death than either of those she has already died if he defied them in any way.

Vicki was written out of the show in 1968, and Maggie succeeded her as governess to the children at Collinwood. The Leviathans have sent a shape-shifting monster from beyond space and time as the harbinger of their conquest. The monster usually takes the form of a young man who initially asked people to call him “Jabe,” but whom everyone instead calls “Jeb.” Jabe is always obnoxious and often homicidal, and has alienated many people from the Leviathans, including Barnabas. He abducted Maggie and thought he had brainwashed her into joining the cult; once he let her go, she made an alliance with Barnabas and Julia to fight the Leviathans.

Barnabas is convinced Jabe is about to do something especially horrible, and so he wants to open the battle. But his concern for Josette is still holding him back. He and Julia talk about this. It dawns on them that the Leviathans may have been lying, and that they may not have the power to make Josette re-die. The only way they can be sure is to ask Josette, so they decide to hold a séance. They enlist Maggie to be the third member of the circle.

The typical Dark Shadows séance involves three roles- the convener, who gives detailed instructions and barks about the importance of following them, even if everyone in the room has attended multiple séances already; the medium, who goes into the trance and channels the voice from the realm of the dead; and the objector, who tries to interrupt and is sternly hushed by the convener. Recent séances have omitted the objector; today, Julia keeps up a running commentary from the time Barnabas starts the incantations until Maggie goes into the trance, but she doesn’t object and Barnabas doesn’t hush her.

Through Maggie, Josette says she had a hard time getting to the séance, but that it had nothing to do with the Leviathans. She says she doesn’t even know the Leviathans. Barnabas doesn’t believe her, and she says that if he wants proof he should come to her grave.

He does. The tinkling tune of the music box plays on the soundtrack; Barnabas does not mention the original signature of Josette’s presence, the scent of jasmine. Her ghost manifests before him:

THE GHOST OF JOSETTE: It is I. And I will tell you what you must know, now and forever. You asked me if the Leviathans held me prisoner. They do not. But you hold me, just as I hold you with my love. But now the time has come for us both to go free.

BARNABAS: I cannot be free without you.

GHOST: But you must. For I belong to the past. For you there is a future with someone else.

BARNABAS: But I don’t want anyone else.

GHOST: Then you must be lonely, for you cannot have me. But you will find someone else. I know it. And when you do, give her this. The ring that you gave to me, give to her, whoever she may be. This ring is a sign of your freedom and of mine. (Returns her engagement ring to him and vanishes.)

Josette says goodbye. Screenshot by Dark Shadows Before I Die.

This is Josette’s final appearance on Dark Shadows, not counting a parallel universe version of Josette who will feature in the last weeks of the show, played by another actress. As for the “someone else,” it would be logical for Barnabas to get with Julia, since the two of them are so deeply complicit in each other’s crimes that neither of them will ever be able to make a life with anyone else. But there have been some hints lately that romance might be budding between Barnabas and Maggie, and if that’s going to happen they are going to have to keep us from thinking very clearly about Josette and Barnabas’ attempts to recreate her. We might suppose that her farewell is meant to clear the path for such a development.

There’s also some business about the Leviathan story. In the opening reprise, Jabe catches a bat, which he plans to use to turn Barnabas back into a vampire.

After Barnabas gets the green light from Josette, he meets with Philip Todd, another person whom Jabe has driven out of the Leviathan cult. Philip tells Barnabas how much he hates Jabe and agrees to steal the Leviathan box, an object which does not play music but which is a lot more effective at controlling the minds of people who open it than was that box of Josette’s. At the end of the episode, Jabe catches Philip with the box.

A commenter on Danny Horn’s great Dark Shadows Every Day who identifies herself as “Melissa”* wrote this lyric about Jabe in two comments about the post covering today’s episode:

Come and listen to my story ’bout s man named Jeb,
Poor Leviathan, barely kept his evil web.
Then, one day, he and Barney had a spat,
And out from the cage came a rubberized bat.
(Vampire bat, that is:
Nylon string,
Terror teeth.)

Next thing you know,ol’ Jeb has got a girl.
Cult folk said, “Jeb, come and rule the world!”
They said, “In the attic is the place you want to be,”
So they threw themselves a seance and they called on J.D.C.
(Josette Collins, that is.
Swimming fail.
Newly scarred.)

Comments left 31 October 2016 by “Melissa” on Danny Horn “Episode 948: War Games,” posted 30 October 2016 at Dark Shadows Every Day.

I’m singing that aloud right now. I realize you might be reading this years after I wrote it, but believe me, I’m singing it right now.

*Apparently also an FotB here.

Episode 947: More! MORE! MO-O-O-RE!!!

Old world gentleman Barnabas Collins comes home shortly after dawn and finds that the window of his front parlor has been smashed in. Entering the house, he finds two young men passed out. He knows both of these men, and knows that neither is what he seems to be. The taller of them, who once asked to be called Jabe, is in his true form an indescribable monster from beyond space and time, the harbinger of the Leviathan People, a race of Elder Gods who mean to retake the Earth and destroy humankind. The other, Chris Jennings, is a werewolf. The Leviathans are vulnerable to werewolves, and Barnabas realizes that Chris reverted to his human form when the sun rose, just as he was about to kill Jabe.

Chris comes to, and Barnabas hustles him out of the house. He then wakes Jabe. He tells Jabe that he fought the werewolf off, killing it and saving Jabe’s life. Barnabas was the original leader of a cult devoted to serving the Leviathans, but has since become disaffected. Jabe had seen evidence of this, and set out for Barnabas’ house meaning to punish him for his disloyalty. But by the time the werewolf chased him into the house he was crying out for Barnabas to help him, so he is ready to believe the story. Taking credit for things he had nothing to do with is one of Barnabas’ core competencies, so it is no surprise to longtime viewers that Jabe decides that he can trust Barnabas after all.

Barnabas’ ex-wife Angelique is now married to a man named Sky Rumson. She does not believe that Sky knows anything about her past or about anything supernatural, but the audience has seen over the last few episodes that he is an agent of the Leviathans. Angelique put Barnabas’ distant cousin Carolyn up in a house she and Sky have on an island to help Barnabas in his fight against the Leviathans while Sky was away on a business trip. At the end of that trip, Sky called to ask Angelique to pick him up at an airport far from the island house. When she got to the airport, she found he had already left. She wound up spending several hours alone on the road. Returning viewers know that Sky’s call was a trick to get her away from the house so Jabe could come and have his way with Carolyn. We also know that Jabe chickened out of his evil plan when he actually saw Carolyn, and that she is fine now.

Angelique comes home from her long wild goose chase and asks Sky what happened. He said he had an important phone call coming at the house, so he had to leave early. Angelique accepts this surprisingly easily. Barnabas shows up to take Carolyn home. He and Sky meet. After Barnabas is gone, Sky asks what the deal is with Carolyn. He presses the point, and Angelique tells him everything she knows about Barnabas and the Leviathans, including that he is now “their most dedicated enemy and he means to use every power he has to stop them.”

This scene is bad news for Barnabas, but it is worse for the audience’s image of Angelique. She used to be a wicked witch of vast destructive power, and was supposed to be the ultimate Soap Opera Vixen. But you wouldn’t have to be a witch, or even a vixen, to avoid the situation Angelique puts herself in. Leaving the airport when he knew she was on the way was a colossal act of thoughtlessness, and no husband who committed it could expect to hear a word from his wife about anything else for at least a week. After that, there will be a long period when she will have an unanswerable source of material to keep him off his guard any time he tries to bring up topics she doesn’t want to discuss. By the time Sky is able to start asking questions about why Angelique had Carolyn spend the night, it will probably be another full moon.

That isn’t even the worst of it. Angelique believes that Sky is simply a denizen of the sunlit world known to us in our everyday experience and explained well by science, and she further believes that he sees her in the same way. That makes it all but impossible for her to tell him what she tells him here. She launches right in with “the Leviathans, they’re terribly dangerous creatures, completely evil and they mean to start a whole new society.” If he really were a total naïf in supernatural matters, this story would lead him to pick up the telephone and call the men in the white coats to come and take Angelique to a place where she could get a good long rest.

I don’t think Angelique’s scene with Sky could have worked in any case, but Geoffrey Scott’s limitations as an actor make it even worse than it had to be. He underacted so severely that he could hardly be said to be giving a performance at all. That makes a stark contrast with Lara Parker, who as Angelique fully embraced the hyper-intense Dark Shadows house style of acting, which, in honor of her own hilarious explanation of it, is sometimes known as “Go back to your grave!” That contrast is interesting at a technical level. It goes a long way towards explaining what Orson Welles meant when he said that hamminess was not overacting, but false acting. Parker goes as far over the top as she can, but there is rarely anything false about Angelique, while every tinny note Scott strikes in his flat recitation of his lines is thoroughly fake.

A charismatic actor might have been wasted as Sky, as Parker is wasted today. But the audience might have been able to meet the show halfway if we could believe that Sky was so fascinating to Angelique that she didn’t realize what she was saying. As it is, Scott looks so much like he is modeling menswear for the Sears catalogue that it is always a bit of a surprise when he moves and speaks. However much Angelique might enjoy Sky’s company, it never occurs to us that he would be a match for her in any sense.

Sky goes to Jabe and repeats what Angelique told him about Barnabas. There is an exchange which looks fine in print, but which Scott’s delivery makes sound like a blooper:

JABE: So everything he told me this morning was a lie! And I thought he had saved my life!

SKY: Evidently, everything he told you was a lie.

You would deliver Sky’s line with an emphasis on “everything,” as would I, as would anyone else. But Scott emphasizes “Evidently” and pauses slightly after “you,” making it sound as if he hadn’t heard Jabe. For a fraction of a second, you can see the amazement in Christopher Pennock’s face as he reacts to this clanger.

Jabe carries a cage with him as he goes to an old graveyard. The camera locks in on him in closeup as he shouts that, while death might be an adequate punishment for a mere murderer, Barnabas must suffer “More! MORE! MO-O-O-ORE!!!” More, more, more, how do you like it, how do you like it….

More more more. Screenshot by Dark Shadows Before I Die.

The first time I saw this scene, I regarded it as a low point- I imagined someone tuning in to Dark Shadows for the first time at that moment, and instantly turning it off, believing ever after that only people of an extremely low mentality could like the show. I still think it’s pretty embarrassing writing, but having seen him in other roles I’ve come to realize that Pennock was in fact a good actor and that as Jabe he was saddled with an impossible task. Also, I’ve seen video of him on panels of original cast members at Dark Shadows conventions, and it is obvious that he was as sweet as Jabe is vicious. So watching the scene today, I ignored Jabe and looked at Christopher Pennock, studying his face to see what he was thinking as he struggled to find a way to give the audience something worth their while.

Jabe makes an incantation, and a bat comes flying to him. He catches it in the cage. We get a closeup of the bat puppet in the cage, which looks very much like a humane trap from Havahart. We know that Jabe plans to use the bat to make Barnabas back into a vampire, which he was for 172 years, but the realistic cage and the adorable little puppet prevent the situation from generating any terror. Dan Curtis said that when he was producing Dark Shadows, his young daughters used to urge him to make the show more frightening. When we were chuckling at the sight of the bat today, Mrs Acilius imitated a child saying “Make it scary, Daddy!”

Behold and tremble! Screenshot by Dark Shadows Before I Die.